So there I was, minding my own business in NCR, dressed up in my finest blue suit, doing my best to look all innocent and helpless for all those naughty thieves to grope on. An lo and behold, the infamous rogue Harold decides to drop by, looking for a fresh virgin to exploit.
He darts off to hide behind a tent but I don't move, I know he'll be back. He can't resist this naked blue booty, all vulnerable and ready for the taking. Sure enough after a minute or two my patience paid off, he comes back around.
He started walking around aimlessly, trying hopelessly to make me think I don't know he want it. Honey, please, don't play coy with me. He takes a few steps towards me, then away, trying to get a response from me, to see if I'll run, but I'm not budging.
All of a sudden, he lunges forward for my exposed body. Little did he know, I was packing a fully automatic M3A1 "Grease Gun", chambered in .45 caliber high-powered baby-killing bullets with the fuck-you switch flipped to full mouth and asshole penetration mode. As soon as I feel his talon-like fingers plunge into my vulnerable pockets, I wait for the signal. The NCR guard gives the go-ahead and I'm about to spray hot hate-metal into his awaiting visage. I quickly pried the uncomfortable piece of metal lodged in the crack of my ass and brought it up square in the face of my offender.
A spring shoots out of my gun and the magazine drops and tumbles to the ground. Critical failure. No ammo. I futilely pull the trigger with a *click click*. It's too late. He turns and sprints down the dusty path out of NCR. I watch him run...run...run....gone.
Unbelievable.
Harold, if you're reading this, I'm not even mad. Just impressed. You earned those 236 caps tonight. Earned them.
Topic: Harold, you lucky bastard (Read 3678 times)