*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP*
MESSAGE FOLLOWS:
SANTA DELAYED BY GIANT RADIOACTIVE STORMS IN THE MIDWEST [STOP]
BE ADVISED: WASTELAND HOUSING PROGRAM WILL CONTINUE ON EXTENDED SCHEDULE [STOP]
CHECK BACK FOR UPDATES DAILY [STOP]
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ADDENDUM: PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT THE ELVES AND GRINCHLINGS [STOP]
THEY ARE WORKING VERY HARD TO IMPROVE QUALITY OF LIFE [STOP]
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MESSAGE ENDS